after reading all about love by bell hooks

I have experienced dysfunctional love at best. I know logically that love and abuse cannot coexist, but I still hold on to my childhood to try and see how I may have been loved. Perhaps I was partially loved. Cared for sometimes, committed to even with declarations of abandonment every month or so, given and upheld responsibility, trusted with intimate knowledge… but possibly not respected at all. I know that given different circumstances, my mother would have been capable of perfect love as we all are. But trauma takes that ability away from you sometimes and I do not fault her completely for being incapable of loving me.

The core values of honesty, strength, bravery, and loyalty are key to have if you want to live a loving life. It is especially brave to choose to love in this world if you are not cisgendered and heterosexual. I know that many critique being complimented or acknowledged for their resilience. Personally, I value the compliment. We have become strong even though who you are does not demand that of you to be fulfilled. I am proud. Know that this strength is what lets you live a loving life right now. I hope in a better world there is no need for unnecessary strength gained from trauma.