I feel like a new tree. I hope people want to grow me. 

To be very real I haven't stopped crying all day. What a sorrowful world. We need weapons and I need science to do something. I have many ideas that come from science fiction and fantasy but nothing concrete obviously. I've been trying to figure out my place in fighting and revolution but I have no idea who I am. Do I do science? Do I infiltrate with my knowledge or try to be the other side with the limited resources I have? Do I serve with a smile and a knife behind my back? Do I write and inspire others? Should I be in the spotlight or the background? Should I make more text posters or try to draw the better world I envision, abstract as it is? Do I hand-write myself into the world or keep my page out of the book?

What do I do? I swear I think about death and every day and given the right opponent I would crush them. But I'm not in the rooms I would need to be in.